Recently I considered doing an estimate on how much time two paid staff members would have to spend offering comprehensive support that would be long lasting and effective, to one extended family involved in drugs, serious crime, imprisonment, etc. – a family in the Focus Group – with the aim of moving the family from a state of dependency to full autonomy.
You will probably gather from reading the website that I believe that to optimise success, in particular in respect of children, [1] support would need to be offered over quite a long time. It would be very difficult to estimate this accurately as the support offered may be very intensive initially, and then after a few years may reduce in intensity, (all going well) and, as the family gained more confidence and autonomy, reduce further in time and energy.
And the end-point (that is, the point at which the family would have normalised to the extent that they would not need support anymore) would be very difficult to estimate.
Having considered all the above I formed the opinion that a very good option might be to support someone in the family, or someone in the community that was trusted by the family, that was concerned, insightful, ambitious, energetic, measured, balanced, etc. in a way that would firstly respect their journey (they would often be a responsible worrier in their family) and secondly honour their ambition to help others in their community.
(This opinion is affirmed by research which I will be referencing in a later post which found that when parents look for advice about parenting, the majority seek support from family, extended family, or friends/neighbours, rather than professional practitioners. And it’s a similar story with children).
But apart from the research, I also formed this opinion because it has been done in Bedford Row Family Project – an organisation that I very deep knowledge of – since its very early days. Results have not been perfect, but they have been good enough to continue its development!
It is important to state that I have observed many people who have the above characteristics (concern, insight, ambition etc.) in every community that I have been in – and beyond. They will often be those that people in the community turn to for a listening ear, for support, sympathetic counsel, perhaps even for advice on how to bail someone out of trouble.
Sometimes, however, their efforts to help people live healthier lives, and effect true change may be hampered by their perception that they are fighting an uphill battle, meeting crisis after crisis, and having unrealistic hopes dashed over many years or indeed decades.
I said in a previous post that it is good if practitioners are part of the process, and it is, but it is bad if practitioners are so much part of the process that they are immersed in it totally. To put it simply, they are too close to the action [2].
Thus, in offering opportunities for support (and indeed training or education) cognisance needs to be taken of this fact. (This will be covered in more depth in Section Five in the Chapter on Training).
Remember that we do not really need to encourage people to do something, as they are doing it already! Rather it is altering their response so that it not only becomes more effective but also begins the process of the multiplier effect in the community in which they live.
This is truly a win-win situation, as it builds confidence, encourages responsibility, models, is gender balanced (the concerned people are not always women), educates workers, is sustaining, has longevity, (if done properly), spreads skills, encourages others with similar ambitions, and above all frees up a wealth of creativity, intelligence, and resolve that may be buried under generations of fear, distrust, and isolation.
[1]. Aha, and what is success? Department of Children and Youth Affairs Better Outcomes Brighter Futures, National Policy Framework for Children and Young People 2014-2020 policy document identifies five outcomes for children including the aspirations that children are active and healthy; that children are achieving in all areas of learning and development; that children are safe and protected from harm; that children have economic security and opportunity and that children are connected, respected and contributing to society. (That’s good enough for me – though if I was writing it I’d have mentioned something about having opportunities for free play – surely a fundamental characteristic of childhood)!
I might also define success as the family members being at ease with each other, members engaging in life affirming and self-fulfilling pursuits, and all children thriving and reaching their potential as they grow from childhood to their mid-twenties.
[2]. The technical term for this in Gestalt Psychotherapy is confluence where the practitioner finds it difficult to separate him/herself from the client at an emotional level.